Wednesday, 14 November 2007

Second fiddle

There are only so many times you can hear tearful repetitions of "Oh, Da-daaaaaa" and "Dada hooooooome" and "Dada baaaaaack, peeeeeeease" before you lose your mind.

It'll be interesting to see how long it takes.

Nathan's work has sent him to a conference in Texas. I didn't give that much thought, because one thing's for sure – I like my space. I'm always happy in my own company and although I love having Nathan around, I've always wondered about couples who say, "We've never spent a night apart". So it all sounded straightforward: see you in a few days, honey.

I didn't bargain for the Berry Factor.

My first mistake was driving Nathan to the airport with Berry along for the ride. My second mistake was not preventing him from getting on the plane.

The tearful pleas began before we were even out of the airport drop-off area, and they lasted, non-stop, all the way home. "Oh Dada baaaaaaack.... Dada hoooome, peeeeease mama" – as if I could conjure him up so long as she asked politely.

All afternoon, more of the same. The bad-mama side of me thinks this is outrageously unfair. Who gives the baths? Who changes the nappies? Who puts the band-aids on? Who does the Berry-wrangling through the grocery store? Who makes all the food? Who combs the tangles out of the curls? Who gets up in the night? That would be me, me, me, me, me, me, and oh – me.

Who gets the devoted fan club? Daddy. Daddy is fun. Daddy is the hero. Yep, that's life.

I called my mum to keep me sane, long-distance, through the worst of it this evening – the dramatic wailing for Dada to come hoooooome and the insistence that a mouse, Santa and a puppy in her Christmas book were all Daddy, and all needed to come baaaaaaack.

I'm not sure who's going to keep me sane the rest of the time – so I suppose that's where the interesting will-I-lose-my-mind experiment kicks in.

We have four days to find out. That'll be plenty.


  1. oh, i totally feel for you - i know what it's like to have a whining 2 year old! their stamina and persistence is quite extraordinary!!!

    oh and the daddy fan club - we have the same thing here. my son spends all day pointing at photos saying dad and is overjoyed when he gets home...

    and my almost 1 year old just threw up...yes threw my HANDBAG!!! i shall blog about it later if i have the energy!

  2. At the end of the day, daddy is always the fun one. My mum used to complain that she would calm us down as babies and get us ready for bed, and dad would come home, get us riled up, and go back to work again leaving 3 very overtired, overstimulated and unhappy children.

    I have a feeling this isn't the end for this topic.

  3. Hel:
    As cathy and j&s attest to ... you aren't alone in these experiences!! And because I'm on the other side of it all, I am compelled to promise it really does get better and better. And better! :O)

    That you are able to express all of this leaves room for much more sanity ... and enjoyment in Life.

    J's Mom

  4. but he has her back, see?
    I'm kidding, I so understand how bad it feels to not be appreciated by children, and the pleating must be driving you nuts. Hang in there just a few days to go! (or is that years? being a daddy's girl myself, I know the love/admiration/idolatry for a little girl's favorite guy never really goes away). I hope your second is boy! ; )

  5. i can remember once my mom missed something at school and i was so mad. she said, "but daddy misses stuff lots and you aren't mad at him when he can't make it."

    my answer: "but you never miss!"

    i got excited about my dad because i KNEW i could always always depend on my mom.

  6. Oh, poor you! And poor Berry! Daddy should be punished!
    But he won't be. He'll get all the loving and kisses and hugs when he gets back. NO FAIR!

  7. J0 (Shelley's Mum)19 November 2007 at 4:51 pm

    I am back on my chair now and I have wiped all my laughter tears away!!

    Your story bought back the most vivid "Daaaddddddy" memories of my first little girl calling for her Daaaadddddddddy at all three sides of our back yard fence.

    She thought that the neighbours also needed to know that her Daaaaddddddy had gone to work and her Mummy had just said NO!!!!!