Tuesday, 27 November 2007

Whinge whinge whinge...

Please raise your hand if you think there should be an easier way to get a baby than nine months of pregnancy.

Thank you.

(All men must raise their hands unless they wish to be beaten soundly by the women around them. Again: thank you.)

It's only 15 weeks and already I'm heartily sick of feeling sick, and food tasting weird, and having a sore back (it happens even before you get big), and having crazy dreams, and sudden bizarre shooting pains, and not being able to get comfy in bed at night (which again, happens even before you get big).

I hate being awake at 3am. I hate maternity clothes with something approaching a passion (I have to feel bad and look unfortunate too? How amusing!). I miss going for runs. I miss wearing pretty things. I miss being nimble – now there's a word that's not used enough. I miss sushi and shrimp and Pinot Grigio, and the occasional diet Dr Pepper.

I miss things that smell nice, because everything smells weird to me, even now that I'm out of the first trimester. I can't tolerate the smell of cologne, moisturiser, lip balm, perfume, air freshener, furniture polish, exhaust fumes, scented candles, incense, dryer sheets, shampoo, face cream, cleanser, shea butter or shaving cream. So showers are fraught with danger – I hold my breath as much as I can. It's a weird little life I'm living here.

I know a lot of women have more trouble – all kinds of trouble. I even know that when I was pregnant with Berry I had a tougher time than this; complications upon complications. Still doesn't make me feel very merry.

But one last thing: I wrote this post, up to here, miserable with sleeplessness at 3 o'clock this morning. At 10am I went to the doctor, and I heard the baby's heartbeat again. Just a few seconds of fluttery little-bird heartbeat – but in that instant all was forgiven.

I won't promise not to whinge anymore (my sister, my mum, my best friend and I all agree that a good whinge is deeply therapeutic) but I have promised myself that I'll remember, every day, that every bit of inconvenience, weirdness, pain, discomfort and annoyance, in the end, will be worth it.


  1. Ah Helen, hope you feel a bit better soon. xx

  2. so true! Both the whinging being therapeutic and it all being worth it at the end!

  3. Hope you feel better.

    I'm new to your blog, please feel welcomed to come n visit mine.


  4. It's always worth. I adored being pregnant. I was nauseated for 2 or 3 weeks with each and then felt fabulous the rest of the time. I feel bad when other women have even a little bit of a tough time with it because it is just SO awesome!
    Hope the smells stop bothering you soon - you can't avoid all the smells out there unfortunately!

  5. i'm one of the lucky ones who had pretty good pregnancies (just HATED the labour)!!! but i still feel for you - whinge away as much and as often as you like ~ hope you feel a lot better soon!

  6. I hope you feel better. I would give anything to feel what you are feeling. Hang in there:)

  7. I hope you feel better. I would give anything to feel what you are feeling. Hang in there:)

  8. Hope the agony doesn't last the whole time! Pregnancy = misery!